Friday, April 18, 2008

Sunshine through the clouds...

Oregon is having the worst spring weather in years. My sun-starved skin is pelted with blistering cold, stinging rain and a dreadfully gray cover of clouds. The sun has gone missing.

It seems that unfortunate events in my own life have brought upon the same dark clouds as the Oregon weather billowing into my usually sunny personality. My face is the sky and my tears the rain. I can’t seem to escape these old dreadful memories.

My privacy is important to me here so I will spare the details of my week of pain and desperation. I will just say that a black pit of despair intertwined with spiders, spines of steel and an ongoing Weird Al ambiance seemed like a better alternative.

Today it seemed a golden ray of God’s beautiful sunshine broke through the barriers of my thick gray clouds. There are beautiful people on earth. Someone does care and love me no matter what my past entails. A man, an amazing man, loves me for me. He’s genuine, sincere and not out to use my sensitive heart and emotions for his own benefit. This man will never raise his voice in anger at me, his hand will never strike me and his words will never betray me. I can’t help but sit here in total awe and wonder…is this for real? I feel like I’m dreaming.

After a terrible week my boyfriend (can’t believe he’s MY boyfriend…he’s too wonderful to be MY boyfriend) sent me the most beautiful arrangement of stargazer lilies in a huge wine glass vase coupled with a heart-shaped “I love you” balloon and the sweetest sentimental note. He claims that he just wanted to make me feel better about myself after having an emotionally trying week. He’s not only succeeded in painting a huge smile on my face but he’s also shown me, once again, that there really is the urban Renaissance man out there! I’ve finally found and fallen in love with him…and the beauty of it all is that he loves me back.

He really is my sunshine…and the only one who can pierce though my dark-clouded days. I love him even more for being the only one capable of doing that. I can’t thank him enough…for him.

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